More Than Small Talk: The Puerto Vallarta Events Built for Real Conversation

Somewhere between my twenties and now, I lost the art of making friends. Turns out, I wasn’t the only one.

Making friends as an adult is hard everywhere, but especially in Puerto Vallarta. Vallarta is a town where many people arrive alone. Some come for a season, some come to stay, some don’t know yet. Half the people you meet in January are gone by May, and the ones who stay are quietly rebuilding a social life from nothing, again, in a language they’re still learning. It’s a city with an enormous heart and a strange revolving door, and the space in between can leave you feeling invisible.

We all do similar things after moving here. You hit up all the touristy spots. The clubs on the malecón, beckoning you in with their music. You take in the Zona Romántica fun, from Act II to Coco Cabaret to Industry. After repeating that a few times you venture into more of the local scene. You explore Cinco de Diciembre, and Café Cálmate and Revueltas become your new hangouts. You discover Santa María Barrio, learn about the tianguis there, and start spending your Saturday mornings bargain hunting after brunch at Obaal’s. Eventually you find yourself in Versalles, eating your way from Artisan Bakery to Gabistro to Ascencio.

And then what? You’ve found the city. You still haven’t found the people.

Why Adult Friendship Stopped Working

A couple of years ago when I stopped drinking, I really started looking at how people were socializing. What I saw was the same conversations over and over. Surface level and performative. I asked myself, why are people calling this a thriving social life when they leave unfulfilled and socially exhausted? Are we really just doing it all for the ‘gram?

So I went on a journey to find out why we keep repeating the exact thing that exhausts us. Here’s what I found. There are two conditions that need to be right for connection to happen effortlessly.

The Two Things Connection Needs

First is the environment. Mixers are designed for small talk, networking events are for talking about your career, and bars are for lighthearted, tell-the-same-story-again nights. None of these environments give us permission to go past the surface.

Second are the people who show up. You can’t build something real with someone who only wants a surface level friendship. If the environment is right but the people who show up aren’t looking for the same thing, you’ll keep putting yourself out there, over and over, and leave with even more social exhaustion than when you started.

And that’s how More Than Small Talk was born. A space where connection happens intentionally, because the whole night is built for it.

People leave feeling seen, heard, valued. Here’s what attendees are saying:

“Hearing my husband of 30 years answer questions, I learned new things about him.”

“I really enjoyed how welcoming and open the space was. It felt really easy to open up right away and talk to other people. I loved that we went deep and got to know each other beyond a surface level.”

“My relationship with the friend I brought deepened.”

Pretty Is Nice. Aligned Is Everything

I care a lot about supporting women owned businesses, but honestly, the most important thing to me is working with people whose values match mine.

When the women behind I Heart Vallarta reached out, it didn’t feel like a pitch. It felt like two people asking, genuinely, how can we help you? Not “come help us build our thing,” but “what do you need?” That’s what curation actually is when it’s done honestly, and it’s rare in a town full of people trying to sell you something.

Every interaction with them, I noticed it. The gratitude in how they talk. The way they treat each other. The way they show up. That’s the part you can’t fake, and it’s the part I was looking for.

When I started More Than Small Talk, I knew I couldn’t build it alone. I needed the right environment and the right people. So it was an easy yes. More Than Small Talk is bigger than me. What they’re building is bigger than a directory. It’s a place where someone new in town can open one page and find the dinner, the dance, the class, the night that’s actually worth going to. Both are really the same project: making a transient city feel like it has room for one more.

That’s the whole point. Spaces of love, inclusivity, and real connection. That’s where communities come alive.

Every group is intentionally kept small — 20 people maximum — and tickets range from 200 to 1,500 MXN.